5 Proven Strategies for Building an Incredible Relationship That Lasts
Have you ever wondered what it takes to create a relationship that not only survives but thrives? Strong relationships don’t happen by chance — they’re built with intention and effort. Here are some positive tips you can start using today for an amazing relationship!
This blog is all about love and relationships
1. Communication
I’m convinced the strategies I’m sharing will definitely help your relationship. However; in my opinion, it all starts with communication— the foundation of any relationship. It is the difference between just listening and truly understanding your partner.
When it comes to love, communication is so much more than words—it’s about truly connecting on every level. It’s about helping your partner feel seen, heard, and cherished. Learning how to communicate effectively will help avoid unnecessary conflicts and foster deeper intimacy.
Honestly, I wish I had known just how important communication was in relationships; perhaps I could have avoided a lot of personal heartache.
TIP: Practice Active Listening
Have you ever turned on the radio while doing the dishes? Or switched on the TV while cooking dinner? You “hear” the sounds but are not really “listening.” I do it all the time for background noise or to distract me from tasks I dislike.
Hearing is a passive, physical process – our ears picking up sound. Listening, however, is an active, intentional act of processing and understanding what’s being said. In our relationships, mastering active listening is key to truly connecting with our partner.
When someone is speaking, give them your undivided attention. I know it may be difficult at first but put away (or turn off) anything that could distract you like TVs, laptops and your PHONE! Try making eye contact with the person you’re speaking to. This shows you’re engaged in the conversation and value what they’re saying.
As difficult as it may be, avoid interrupting or jumping in with your own stories right away. Make sure you allow them to finish their thought. Ask follow-up questions. This lets the person know you’re actively listening and helps your partner feel valued and heard.
Remember to ask questions! Please, for the love of everything, don’t assume you know what they’re thinking…you are NOT a mind reader…please ask! You can say something like, ‘what’s been on your mind lately?”
Have you heard of The 5-Minute Timer Game? It’s easy—you set a timer and let one partner talk about their feelings, uninterrupted, for 5 minutes. Then switch!
Body language, facial expressions and tone of voice are very important while communicating as well. These are non verbal communicators. Please be mindful of your facial expressions like eye rolling, head movements, arm folding, etc. Instead, lean in or nod to show that you’re tuned into the conversation. Remember, you’re creating a safe space for honest dialogue. Making these small changes will make your partner feel truly heard and enhance the quality of your relationship.
2. Emotional Intelligence: Managing your Emotions
Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage your emotions while also being tuned into your partner’s feelings. It’s what helps you stay calm during disagreements, empathize with your partner’s struggles, and build a deeper emotional bond.
Emotional intelligence won’t allow you to kick your partner when they’re already down. And sometimes that can be challenging.
Love isn’t just about romance; it’s about understanding—both yourself and your partner. Think of it as your relationship’s secret sauce, helping you navigate the highs and lows with grace and empathy.
TIP: Start with Self-Awareness
You can’t connect with your partner’s feelings if you don’t understand your own. Journaling can help you identify your emotional triggers.
TIP: Practice Empathy Daily
It shows your partner that you’re truly on their side. During conversation, repeat back what you hear, for example, “it sounds like you’re feeling stressed about your job, right?” Empathy helps your partner to feel understood. If you still feel like your partner still isn’t ‘getting it,’ try swapping roles for fun. Try arguing your partner’s point of view to understand their perspective a little better. I know it sounds a little silly but it does work!
TIP: Master Emotions
Emotional outbursts can damage trust and create distance in a relationship. In a disagreement or when emotions are high, take a “timeout” to cool off—especially when dealing with sensitive topics. Don’t get so angry to the point your saying something you can’t take back. Your words matter!
Remember your partner is on your side—they are not your opponent!
TIP: Couple’s Emotional Check-In
Once a week, ask each other, “How are you really feeling?” and listen without judgment.
Finally, Emotional intelligence isn’t just a trendy term—it’s the key to a thriving relationship. When you understand and manage your own emotions while staying tuned into your partner’s, you build a strong foundation of love, trust, and connection. With this foundation, your relationship can weather any storm.
3. Trust
Like communication, trust is another component that holds everything together in a relationship. Without trust, even the most passionate love can feel uncertain and unstable. Building and maintaining trust is essential for creating a relationship where both partners feel safe, valued, and understood.
When trust is strong, it becomes easier to navigate disagreements, handle life’s curveballs, and grow together as a couple.
TIP: Be Honest and Transparent
Honesty shows your partner they can rely on you, even in difficult situations. Transparency builds respect and eliminates misunderstandings. Instead of hiding a mistake, admit it, and work together to find a solution.
Share your thoughts and feelings openly, even when they’re uncomfortable. In the beginning of my marriage, my spouse refused to be completely honest with me for fear of ‘hurting my feelings.’ That strategy was not helpful—actually it caused more damage. Not being completely honest caused feelings of resentment toward me which built up over time.
TIP: Keep your Promises
Reliability is the backbone of trust. Broken promises, even small ones, can hinder your partner’s faith in you. Only make commitments you can realistically keep. If something comes up, communicate it as soon as possible. For example, if you say you’ll be home at a certain time and there’s a delay, let your partner know as soon as possible.. When building trust, keeping your word is so important.
TIP: Show Empathy and Forgiveness
Instead of focusing on blame, approach conflicts with a mindset of understanding and problem-solving. Remember nobody’s perfect. Empathy and forgiveness are crucial for rebuilding trust after mistakes. And know there WILL be mistakes!
Trust isn’t built overnight, but it’s strengthened with consistent honesty, reliability, and empathy. Make it a priority, and the love you share will only grow deeper. Start with small, intentional actions today to nurture trust and watch your relationship thrive.
4. Keeping the Spark Alive: Fostering Intimacy and Joy
Relationships don’t thrive on autopilot—keeping the spark alive requires intention, creativity, and a bit of fun! Over time, it’s easy to let life’s responsibilities overshadow the romance and joy you once shared; especially couples that have been together 5, 10, even 20 years. But with some effort, you can reignite that passion and keep your relationship fresh, exciting, and full of love.
Regularly nurturing your relationship deepens emotional intimacy and helps both partners feel valued.
TIP: Prioritize Quality Time Together
Spending meaningful time together strengthens your bond and reminds you why you fell in love.
Schedule weekly date nights—whether it’s a fancy dinner, a cozy movie night, or an adventurous outing…just remember to do something together.
Try an evening free from technology to focus solely on each other. In other words, no phones!
TIP: Be Playful and Spontaneous
Laughter and spontaneity bring lighthearted energy into the relationship, keeping things fun and unpredictable.
Surprise your partner with small gestures, like leaving a love note on the mirror or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Share inside jokes or create silly traditions just for the two of you.
TIP: Cultivate Physical Intimacy
Physical touch releases oxytocin, the “love hormone,” which strengthens connection and trust. Make time for physical affection, like hugs, kisses, and cuddles, even on busy days. Experiment with ways to enhance intimacy, such as romantic massages or setting the mood with candles and music.
A fun idea could be to dedicate one evening a week to connecting physically and emotionally—whether through a romantic dinner or simply holding hands on a long walk. I’m not a big fan of ‘scheduling’ physical intimacy but if that works for you, go for it!
TIP: Express Gratitude and Appreciation
Feeling appreciated strengthens emotional intimacy and reduces feelings of being taken for granted.
Regularly tell your partner what you love about them.
Acknowledge the small ways they contribute to your happiness, like making your coffee or supporting your dreams.
Keeping the spark alive is an ongoing journey that evolves as your relationship grows. By prioritizing quality time, embracing playfulness, nurturing physical and emotional intimacy, and showing appreciation, you can create a relationship full of passion, joy, and lasting love.
5. Conflict Resolution
Conflict is an inevitable part of any relationship. But rather than seeing disagreements as a sign of trouble, think of them as opportunities for growth. When handled well, conflict can deepen trust, improve communication, and bring couples closer together. The key lies in how you approach it.
TIP: Focus on the Issue, Not the Person
Criticizing your partner can make your partner defensive and derail the conversation. Address the specific behavior rather than attacking their character. Instead of saying, ‘You’re so inconsiderate,” try saying, ‘I felt hurt when you forgot…”
Blame puts your partner on the defensive and escalates tension. Focus on your feelings and the problem at hand, not whose fault it is.
TIP: Shutting Down Emotionally
Stonewalling or giving the silent treatment creates distance and prolongs the conflict. If emotions run high, take a break to cool off, but promise to revisit the conversation later. Remember, while its ok to take a break from a difficult conversation, not talking to your partner, on purpose for an extended amount of time is not wise and won’t get you the results you desire.
Stick to the topic and focus on resolving the immediate problem.
TIP: Seek Solution Together
Collaboration shifts the focus from winning an argument to finding a resolution that works for both of you. Brainstorm ideas as a team, and be open to compromise.
Reinforce your commitment by expressing gratitude for working through the conflict together.
Finally, conflict resolution isn’t about avoiding disagreements—it’s about handling them in a way that strengthens your relationship. By focusing on the issue, using “I” statements, and collaborating on solutions, you can turn challenges into opportunities for growth.
Next time conflict arises, approach it with patience, empathy, and a willingness to work together. You’ll not only resolve the issue but also deepen your connection.
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